Piggysnoot

Nora got a swing for the outside swing set this week. This meant a trip to Toys R Us…seems they’re the only store in the neighboring four counties that have outside baby swings. We quickly found the swings but decided to take a trip through the very tiny baby section while we were there. That would be the section is small…it’s not like they only have things for very tiny babies…anyhow…it was a tad past dinner time and I was starting to get famished. Luckily for me there was help in sight! The snack shelf by the registers was stocked full. I searched for a healthier alternative to a candy bar…partially because I’m trying to eat better…and partially because I knew that I wanted to have ice cream later and thought I might feel less guilty if I had a healthy snack. I found the perfect thing…animal crackers…they are fat free, you know. I toss them next to the baby swing to be rung up…assuring my mom that Nora wanted them. We weren’t even out of the parking lot and I was tearing into the box. Do you KNOW how many animal crackers are in a two ounce box? Well?!? DO YOU?!? Four. Precisely four. Who the hell eats only four animal crackers at a time? The only thing that would’ve pissed me off more is if it had been my sixty five cents that bought them. Then. Then there would’ve been a fight between me and that damn giraffe. As it is he should consider himself warned…you hear me Geoffrey? Who spells Geoffrey with a G anyway? A stupid talking giraffe, that’s who. Seriously, Geoff…I’m watching you…start putting more crackers in that box…or at the very least start making them with crack…at least that would justify the cost…