Monthly Archive for March, 2007

Judgment Day

Tuesday was the big day…the day of Larry’s sentencing. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, read this post and part 2 here. Monday was pretty terrible, as you can imagine. I spent the day feeling like everything was being done for the last time for a while…the last time we’d go out for lunch…the last time Larry and Nora would have a bath…the last time he’d read her a bedtime story. I shed many tears here and there throughout the day…just the thought that we’d be going to court the next day and that I’d likely be coming home without Larry was enough to send my emotions all over the place. I was more sad at the idea that he’d be missing out on Nora’s life than anything. We were, of course, preparing for the worst. The attorney told us to plan for prison time…not to expect anything less.

After a restless night’s sleep, we woke up pretty early on Tuesday. I got Nora ready to go to the sitter’s house because the lawyer thought she’d be a distraction and wanted us to leave her home. I had her all dressed and ready to go and Larry carried her to the car so my mom could take her to Erica’s house. I stayed inside crying my eyes out…this would most likely be the last time he’d see her for a while…and even then it’d be behind glass on visitation day. I don’t know how he made it through the morning without crying…but I guess I was enough of a basket case for both of us.

We picked up Larry’s friend Mike, who along with another friend, Bob, was speaking to the judge on Larry’s behalf. The tension in the air in the car was terrible. I felt bad that neither of us were chitty chatty…I was too busy concentrating on how difficult the next hour (or year) was going to be. Making sure not to be late, we arrived at the courthouse fifteen minutes early and began the longest wait of our lives. Larry’s mom and brother were there, along with my mom, grandma, brother, and Mike and Bob. I kind of zoned out while we were waiting…focusing only on the feeling of Larry’s hand in mine…trying to memorize every thing about him…

The prosecutor made his comments and then things were handed over to Larry’s attorney, who introduced Mike, Bob, and Larry’s mom to the judge. Each of them spoke for a few minutes. His mom made sure to tell the judge how important Larry is to her business because he’s been running things for her since his father passed away…and she ended by saying, simply, “I believe he’s going to stay on the right track…because I believe in him…” It was very matter of fact and brought the first tear to my eye since we had entered the courtroom. Mike spoke next…pointing out how well Larry has been doing in AA while being out on bond. Dr. Bob took the podium to confirm what Mike had said…that Larry’s been doing everything he should be as an active AA member…he also mentioned that a very real medical problem caused Larry to relapse. I am thankful that Bob and Mike spoke to the judge…they both really came through to help Larry by vouching for him.

The last person to speak to the judge was Larry himself. It took him several minutes to compose himself after hearing all the nice things his mom, Mike, and Bob had said about his character and how well he has been doing. I sat there willing him to stop crying enough to talk to the judge…all the while crying myself. The sheriff deputy that was in the courtroom handed a tissue to Larry…I thought this was especially sweet…here he was, a big burly deputy…having the compassion to pass a tissue to a crying, admitted felon. Larry told the judge about getting clean…helping his mom with the business…going to counseling…attending AA meetings…and his plans to go back to college to be a counselor to help others. The part that really got me, though, was when he told the judge how thankful he is that he was clean before Nora was born…that something like this had to happen to force him to stop using.

The judge’s final decision was to sentence Larry to 120 days in the county jail with work release privileges, three years of probation, a $1000 fine, and 100 hours of community service. All in all, we feel very grateful to the judge for taking Larry’s mom’s business and our family into consideration. He reports to jail on the 27th…and the end day for this whole situation is the 24th of July…not that I’m counting or anything! This is, by far, the best outcome that there could have been. Larry has to be driven to work and brought back to the jail. The added bonus to that is that he works a half hour away…so he’ll have some time each day to visit with me and Nora in the car on the way. Another thing that is pretty nice is that he’s the manager at the business…so he’ll be working everyday…to give him the most out of jail time he can have. So while this is definitely a punishment…and Nora won’t get to take a bath with her Daddy or have him read her stories at bedtime for a little while…it’s a shorter and better sentence than we ever imagined. I’m not exactly sure how I’m going to bathe her by myself for the next few months, but I am thankful that my prayers were answered. He’ll be out before the end of summer…before my birthday…before our 5th anniversary…before Nora is talking and walking…before Christmas…and before Nora’s first birthday. I feel relief that we’re on the downside of things now. Larry has a strict set of instructions and requirements to complete a drug court program when he gets out…along with his community service and fines…but we’re both ready to tackle whatever we need to to keep his disease in check…

Thank you to our friends and family, whose support means more than we can ever put into words. Thank you to all who have emailed me to see how we’re doing. We’re doing much better now. We’re looking forward to putting this behind us. We’re going to make it…and that’s the best part of all…because had you asked me a year ago I wouldn’t have felt so sure. I think I am a stronger person having gone through this…although truthfully there have been times that I would have traded in this opportunity to gain strength for something a bit less stressful. I know one day soon we’ll reflect on this and see it as the beginning of a much better life than we were going to have, had Larry continued to use drugs. There are far better things in store for us.

Month 2 Week 3 Update

Dear Nora,

Caution: This post contains a partial shot of your Mommy’s boobie. The photo is just beautiful…and was, of course, taken by your Daddy while you were eating. I know this isn’t the first time you’ve seen Mommy’s boobie…but it is the first time the Internet has seen Mommy’s boobie…at least the first time they’ve seen it for free

Daytime is for playtime. That’s what I’ve been telling you all this week because it became apparent that you had nights and days mixed up. You would sleep five or six hours at a time during the day…only to spend a few hours a night crying because you didn’t want to be in bed. I remembered reading the Baby Whisperer book and set out at the beginning of this week determined to get you on a schedule…whether you were going to cooperate or not. At first you definitely did not jump on board…but amazingly enough it only took a few days and things are going much better now.

Nora

I must admit, it took diligence on my part to get this schedule thing working. On the nights that you cried from 4-7 am it was tempting to let you sleep the morning away…so that I could do the same. On those days, I donned my Good Mommy hat and woke you up at your regular morning time…and woke you up 2 1/2 hours later. This seemed to show you pretty quickly that the daytime is for being awake, and you had the day schedule down in no time. Now I wake you in the morning…you eat…we play…and you go down for a nap…usually with minimal fussing.

Nora

The night time routine was a little more difficult if only because it forces your Daddy and I to be home and ready to get things started by 8:30. There were a few days that we were out and couldn’t get you started on bedtime…I’m pretty sure this is why you didn’t get bedtime right away. Amazingly enough, though, three or four nights of doing the routine and you now go to sleep within twenty minutes of being put down. So every night you take a Daddy Bath around 8:30…then you get in a last minute snack…Daddy reads you the animal sounds book (that you love)…we tuck you in and turn off the lights…and we read the Snuggle Puppy book. This has been working so well I almost feel like we’re waiting for the night that you scream for hours…just to show us who’s really in charge, here.

Nora

We had to take you to the Children’s Hospital this week to have blood drawn. Hopefully we’ll have the results back by the beginning of next week. We’re trying to get the official word about a suspected genetic problem. The doctor we met this week says he’s pretty sure you’re a carrier for this disease called galastosemia…apparently the screening tests they do are so sensitive that they pick up carriers, too. He said you look healthy and are responding to stimuli and progressing like you should be. This will just determine for sure what exactly is going on.

Nora

I feel like this week has been such a success! Daddy and I are getting better sleep because we’ve got your night time schedule working so well. I still have to wake you during the day…I’m pretty sure if I don’t, you’ll revert to being mixed up…so I’m fine with having to wake you if it means I can get a decent amount of sleep at night! This whole schedule thing has made all the difference in our days. You like to play and swing…you nap when you should…I feel like a rock star, Baby Girl!

Nora

Another thing we’ve noticed is that you are positively mesmerized by your hand…specifically your thumb and first finger on your right hand. One day this week I thought you had been asleep for an hour…I went to check on you and you were wide awake just looking at your hand. You study your thumb and first finger like you’re trying to figure out what the hell is going on. You will lay there making a pinching motion and be content as can be for quite a while. It’s so awesome to watch you as you have that look of recognition as you see your hand come into view…and then as this look changes to extreme concentration…it’s a very cool thing to see. You amaze me more and more each day…

Nora

Love,
Mommy

A New Look

Well…whaddaya think of the redesign?! I’ve been wanting to change things and just got around to getting Larry to make the changes for me. It looks like we’ve got all the bugs fixed…and the menu will be up and running soon…

If things still look the same to you, empty your cache…delete cookies…clear your history…somethin’ technical like that…

Things will be being tweaked here and there in the next few days…this is just the first phase of the new stamplog…which will be having its name changed to Piggy Snoot…more on that later, too…

Baby Nora’s First Ouchie

Dear Nora,

I’ve said it a million times over the last day or so…but Mommy really is sorry. I hate using those stupid baby nail clippers…and I extra hate that I cut you with them. You’ve never seen so much blood from such a little cut…and to have you just crying and crying broke my heart…because it was my fault. Isn’t it funny that I spend a good majority of my day trying to make you happy and quit crying? Then with one wrong move of the nail clippers I’ve got you crying from a Mommy boo boo. Daddy and I tried to get your thumb to quit bleeding…the pressure from a wet wash rag wasn’t helping your screams, of course. Finally we opted for a band-aid…although if I thought they would’ve given you stitches I might have taken you to the ER. After Daddy performed surgery on the band-aid to make it Nora-sized, we got it all situated on your thumb. It was, of course, the thumb you had just discovered you could suck…so we decided we better cover it or you’d be sucking on a nast-o band-aid all day. I got a red sock to put over your hand…red in case you bled through the band-aid. You poor thing…couldn’t even suck your thumb to console yourself. After removing your bandage it seems like it’s healing quite nicely…Grandma says that’s because you’re keeping it clean by sucking on it…seems gross to me…but, hey…whatever works for ya…

Here you are with your sock bandage shortly after we got you all fixed up…

Nora

Daddy just had to take a picture to prove that Mommy made you cry…and bleed. And in case you were wondering if I cut you on purpose since you only let me sleep a half hour the night before…well I didn’t. Perhaps I was unsteady from my lack of sleep…maybe you’ll want to think about that the next time you plan an all nighter…never know when it’ll be time to trim your nails…

Sorry again, Baby,
Love,
Mommy

Smiles McSmiley

Nora…smiling at her Daddy…

Nora

Nora

If You’re Happy and You Know It

Finally we caught Nora in a good mood and managed to get her smiling on video!

Month 2 Week 2 Update

Dear Nora,

This week we bought a new digital camera…you were becoming too elusive for our old one…by the time it snapped the picture you’d look away…which left us with several pictures of you looking anywhere but towards the camera. This new camera is much more baby friendly and I anticipate lots more pictures in our future. You’re not too fond of the flash, but I imagine you’ll get used to it…or you’ll go blind…not sure which…

Nora

We took you on your first vacation this week. We went to the Henry Ford Museum and Imax Theater in Dearborn, Michigan. You slept the whole way there…and the whole way home. The Imax movie was a 3D NASCAR show. Someone asked if it’d be too loud for you…turns out it put you right to sleep. The day of the museum trip we had you all situated in your car seat in a stroller…where you slept. Noticing a theme, Little One?! I certainly did. What’s the big idea sleeping so well while we were awake?! We prefer that you sleep when we can sleep, too. That’s why we cut the museum tour short to come home…we figured you’d sleep in your car seat when we got home…wrong-o. I seriously cannot figure you out. I keep telling myself you don’t do things on purpose just to piss me off…but I’m not so sure…

Nora

You had your two month check up this week…where you measured 24 inches long! Wowsers! You lost four ounces, though, so the doctor is going to recheck your weight in a month. He suggested that I feed you on both sides even if you act like you’re finished after one side. So, I guess it turns out the problem could’ve been caused by me not feeding you…sorry about that…I’m sure it’s not the first dumb-Mommy moment you’ll be exposed to. Other than the weight loss he said things are looking fine. Your heart is still beating and you’re still breathing so I think that’s definitely a few points in mine and Daddy’s favor…

Nora

You like to snuggle up to your Daddy…and it’s so sweet to see. When he holds you and you’re sleepy you bury your head in his shoulder…turn your face towards his neck…and just snuggle. Those moments are precious to me. While we don’t want to rush you, we’re both looking forward to when you can reach up to say, “pick me up”…you’re such a sweetie pie already! I hope you want to snuggle with us until you’re at least fifteen years old!

Nora

You’re smiling and cooing more and more each day. It really does make up for the times you won’t go to sleep…luckily for you! You also found your thumb this week. A book I have says babies don’t find their thumb/hands until four months…bull-snot…when you’re tired and cranky you bring your hand right up to your mouth. You don’t always get just your thumb in your mouth…sometimes you get a few extra fingers in there, too. When you’re sleepy and won’t take your pacifier I can totally jam your thumb in you mouth and usually you’re out like a light. I love how you spread all your fingers out across your face instead of making them into a fist…although I’m wondering how long it’ll take you to figure out that those are your fingers poking your eyes out. Seeing you suck your thumb is just the cutest thing on the planet. It makes me smile and turns my insides to mush…

Nora

Love,
Mommy